I have two little hands, which are no match whatsoever for the four hands of the Crunchers. This morning, as I was working around them to get my hair looking somewhat civilized, I realized they had taken my brush out to the living room. I went to get it (maybe 10 sec. to find it.) When I returned I found them smashing my make-up and smearing it into the rug. I had to work fast. I gathered it all up, and put it on the kitchen counter while I shook out the rug on the deck, so it wouldn't get rubbed in any worse.
Cole followed me, and grabbed a chair to get it back, but lost interest when he saw a dry erase marker. I came back in with the rug, and one cabinet was covered with marker, not to mention his shirt. I hurried and soaked the markered part of the shirt in bleach, and heard a spraying sound. What's that? Oh, Grant has the hair spray EVERYWHERE, and I quickly confiscated it, ran to get the camera away from Cole, and then back to get the soap away from Grant. "OUT, OUT, OUT," and everyone was shooed out of the bathroom, and door shut. (That's about half of what happened in 30 min, but I don't want to bore anyone. And don't even think about telling me to keep doors closed, and things out of reach. No, no, no. They are way more advanced than that. If I throw all the chairs, step stools and large toys off the deck, they'll still find a way to get on the counter and into everything. And there aren't enough secure places to put everything. It already takes me three times longer to heat soup because of all the precautions, and security I must override to get what I need.) So, we all went outside.
What can they get into outside? Plenty, really. But that's not nearly as headache inducing as the constant hitting each other with sticks, throwing mud on kitties, wrestling for the driver seat of the mower, and not being content with a single object in the world, unless the other one has it first.So, all you other mothers of monkeys out there, please tell me - am I going to survive?
6 comments:
And more to the point: will the monkeys survive?
BTW, don't the boys look handsome in their new rain-proof jackets made by their mama? Now we just need some rain. Well, my parents are coming to visit and that always seems to bring out the wet weather.
Aaah, the joys of parenting. Although sometimes it seems unfortunate, YES, you will survive. Your boys, as long as you learn the ancient art of locking them in a room so you can have a cool down time, will also survive. Your house, on the other hand, may not survive, but monkeys live best in trees, right?
Thanks for the laugh today. JuJu and I thoroughly enjoyed reading about your adventures this morning. Good luck!
You MADE those jackets??? You're amazing. They look awesome.
Whew! What a morning! You are one brave woman!
I hope you are taking good notes so you can hit 'em with this information when they are old enough to feel remorse.
Praying for you in NE AZ
Regarding the previous entry, I would love to have two monkeys, please! I happen to know that these monkeys come from from very superior stock!
Regarding this entry, NOW do you believe me when I say that when our little ones were growing up our house was always a big mess?? When your kids grow up you will be telling them this same thing and they will say"No it wasn't Mom, it was always clean and neat." Those jackets are so darling! Love you all!!
What is wrong with you guys? Don't you teach your kids ANYTHING? Mine would never do something so crazy! Natalie would never be elbow deep in peanut butter, during the five minutes I took to feed my baby, and then while cleaning that mess up she headed to the bathroom where she plugged up my sink and had 2 inches of standing water. While swimming in the bathroom, trying to find my floor and listening to an underfed baby scream , she and her sister took paint (permanent, of course) and painted me some lovely pictures all over the table and chairs. Oh, they also managed to get some of the paint on the paper they were making for Daddy!
And somebody said we WANTED these creatures? They are definitely from YOUR side of the family!!!!
Love ya , I hope you ALL survive! If you need an escape, they can join my monkeys.....we've given up long ago on the nice house concept!
Since these monkeys function best - and least destructively - out of doors; I think you should visit our expansive, outdoor, monkey retreat. Completely free of glasses, plates, and make-up, your monkeys can roam freely and happily on our preserve. Call to schedule your monkey getaway today.
Post a Comment